Decisions, Decisions

And so, it's time to begin. There are a lot of big ticket items on my list this year. In fact, it makes me feel a bit overwhelmed when I think about getting them all done. Part of me wants to jump right in and try to do everything at once, but if there's anything I've learned through my work, it's that it's sometimes best to pick one or two things to focus on at a time. Once those are solid, move on to another. I think quite a few of these list items will require me to draw from all the amazing behavioural techniques I've learned at work. Here's hoping they work as well for me as they do for my munchkins!


I took a look at the list and thought about the motivation for each item, and that helped me focus on the ones I should start with. The Jays game will have to wait, especially since they (devastatingly) lost the ALCS last night. I'm extremely proud of them none the less. But I digress. The turducken and fencing will wait, I need to do some MAJOR prep before I'm ready for a 10K, I still have a few more pounds to go before I make the 3 items of clothing, and I need to figure out exactly HOW I'm going to do the one week tech free. I think the sushi will come soon, but it won't take as much mental fortitude as the items I think I should start now. 


So that leaves not picking my cuticles, reading more, getting up in the morning, improving my housekeeping skills and going on a non-internet date. As I've already said, I'm not in a place right now where I want to start looking for dates. I'm actually pretty happy with the way that aspect of my life is going right now, and I'm not interested in changing it at the moment. My housekeeping would probably improve if I wasn't so tired all the time, and my cuticles, well, that definitely needs to change, but that'll take some very serious reinforcement/punishment to shape. So that leaves 2, which actually go hand in hand. The first list item(s) I'm going to tackle is 10. Get better at getting out of bed in the morning, and along with it (because it will help calm me at night), 11. Read for at least 30 mins 5 times a week. I found a really interesting article on how to make getting out of bed in the morning easier, which I will attempt to follow and will post when I manage to complete it. I start Monday. You'll hear all about it in 21 days...

The Valancy Stirling Project 2015!

Hello! Not a huge post today, just wanted to let everyone know that I have finally nailed down the list items for this year's edition of The Valancy Stirling Project. I was in a bit of a rut, as I explained in this post. Some of these things were on the last list (a couple of them maybe even the last TWO lists), but they were things that I really wanted to accomplish. Looking at the list, I feel like it's pretty ambitious in some respects, but more than anything I feel excited about it. Lets see how it goes!

1. Run a 10K; As some of you know, I started running in the spring. I'm hella slow, and I don't go nearly as often as I should, and the streets by my house are too narrow to run on in the winter, but I'll find a way to get it done. I even have a couple of friends who have volunteered to run with me!

2. Cook a turducken; If one bird is good, surely 3 birds cooked together should be amazing! I think this will be Christmas dinner for my parents and me.

3. Make 3 more pieces of clothing; I have lots of patterns and bought the fabric for a few of them already. The thing that was holding me back from completing this on the last list was that I wanted to lose some weight, and since I've now done that I'm ready to go!

4. Establish better housekeeping habits; I am not a good housekeeper. But I want to be. I'm not a total slob, I just tend to have clutter and dishes are currently my major downfall, but I'm getting better. My plan is to make being tidy a habit....which has failed so far. But it's on the list, so I have to do it!

5. Learn to properly roll sushi; I LOVE sushi and have made a messy version with my friend before, but I want to learn to do it properly. With real, good ingredients. It'll be delicious either way.

*6. Go on at least 1 date with a guy I did NOT meet online; This one I'm not going to start until later in the year. Unless someone comes along and something happens between us naturally, of course. I have to psych myself up for dating, and I have too many other things I want to do in the next few months, so this one will be a later item. I have an interesting plan for it though, so stay tuned!*

7. Take a fencing class; This was an idea from a friend when I put out a call for list item suggestions, and I immediately thought it sounded like an amazing idea. Sadly, we missed the registration for the fall, but we're going to try again in the spring. Clearly, I plan to recreate the sword fighting scene from "The Princess Bride" once I've finished the class.

8. One week tech free; Yeah. Another suggestion from a friend, and one that I really think I should do. I'll have to figure out logistics, since I need my tech for work, and I don't want to be completely cut off from contact with my friends and family. 

9. Stop picking my cuticles; As I sit here chewing on my thumb. Yet another audience request from one of the many friends who slaps my hand every time they see me picking at it. This one will be hard...

10. Get better at getting out of bed in the morning; Why did I pick so many hard things??? Anyway, this NEEDS to happen, because I'm tired of rushing and/or being late for work because I can't motivate myself to get the hell out of bed in the morning. I found some great tips that I'm going to try.

11. Read for at least 30 mins 5 times a week; I absolutely love to read, and keep buying books, but I have not made reading a priority lately. Probably because I've become too dependent on my technology. So I'm going to make it a priority again. Yet another habit-forming list item.

12. Go see a Blue Jays game; This is a big one. I have been a loyal Blue Jays fan since 1991; before the World Series wins, before I played ball myself, and before this year's amazing season. I was 8 years old when I first fell in love with them, and yet I've never seen them play. So I'm going to do it this year. Next season, obviously, because there is no way I'd get to a game this year. I'll have to save up and find someone to go with, but those are minor details. I'm going to see the Jays!!

So there it is! I kind of think I love this list. It's not as long as some of the others, but most of the items will take longer, and do more for my self-improvement in the long run. Wish me luck!

*Update: As of February 4th I am no longer going to go on a date with someone I didn't meet online. See the reasons here. Instead, I am going to make "De-cluttering un-needed items from my life" the new item #6.

Elephant Shoes

Love. Probably my favourite thing in the entire world, hands down. I love being loved, and even more than that, I love loving. People, animals, things. I'm a big, gooey, sappy ball of feels. And as luck would have it, I happen to live a life that allows, nay, encourages me to embrace this aspect of my personality. I am extremely close to my family. We spend a lot of time together and are open and honest about our feelings for one another. I also have amazing friends who are supportive, caring and fill me with laughter and joy. Having a huge heart full of love is vital in my line of work. It might as well be written in my job description. I am continually amazed by the love I feel for the kids that I work with. They can turn a bad day around with the smallest action or smile. I'm pretty sure that my many fandoms and geeky interests are also a bi-product of my need to love. They need to be loved, those fictional characters. 

I watch a ridiculous amount of movies, and many of my most well-worn DVDs are movies about love. "Moulin Rouge" has long been among the top few, and I can't always explain why. Yes, it's a musical, one of my favourite genres, and yes, it has updated versions of classic songs, which I'm almost always a fan of, and yes, it stars my now-and-forever love Ewan McGregor, but the reasons I love it go much deeper than that. The main theme of the movie is the main theme of my life. Above all things, love. The quote in this picture is on a canvas in my room. It's the first thing I see when I wake up in the morning and the last thing I see before I go to sleep. I did that for a reason. 

There is one particular line in the movie that has always resonated with me, not as much for its message, like the one above, but for the simple fact that it sums up exactly how I feel about love. Despite the fact that the character who says it seems to live a wild, carefree life, there is something missing, and I can empathize with him. I DO long for love with every fiber of my being. I always have, and I always will. 

Now, without sounding too conceited, I know that I have a lot to offer a partner. I'm lucky enough to be surrounded by people who never let me forget my worth. I'm smart, cute, friendly, caring, have a wide variety of interests, own my own car, have a good job, average amount of debt, my family is only the normal amount of crazy, my punctuality is improving, my housekeeping and cooking skills are getting less disturbing with each passing day, I don't growl at people in the morning (even if it takes me an hour to actually get out of the damn bed), and I'm really getting my potential hoarding tendencies under control. But I'm still single. I'm stumped. 

Before you start spouting clichés at me, understand that I'm not looking for sympathy or kind words. I'm just stating facts. I am single. I have never had the kind of relationship that I can truly be myself and comfortable in. I've only been in love once, almost 4 years ago, and THAT love was the naive, self conscious love of someone who didn't really know what she was doing. I yearn to be in love. I ache for it. I desperately want to be able to throw myself, heart and soul, into a relationship with someone who feels the same way about me. Am I pining for it, wasting my life waiting for a man to complete me? No. Not at all. I know that my purpose in life isn't to meet the perfect guy, fall in love and have babies. My purpose in life is to live well and be happy. I am doing that now. But I am also a hopeless romantic, and I believe that somewhere out there, someone is living their life, looking forward to the day when our lives finally intertwine. Will our life be perfect? No. But it will be ours and we will live it together.  

And so, part of my journey this year will be to continue living my life, grateful for what I have and exploring new avenues. But along with that, one of my most exciting and challenging list items will be to put myself out there, where, hopefully, the right person and I will finally meet. Here's to the journey.

Learning to Love the Fool in Me

Ok. I'll admit it. I am a horrible blogger. Despite the fact that I adore my blog and all the fantastic things it has brought into my life, I just haven't been making it a priority. I guess I felt like it had served its purpose. It helped me re-connect with the best parts of myself, the parts that I'd pushed aside for years. And I have been so busy enjoying life that I just didn't have time to sit down and write. 

But lately I've been feeling a bit...off. Not myself. Sort of lost. Nothing major, just not as full of joy and excitement for life as I was a few months ago. I've slipped back into my old habits; overthinking, stressing, doubting myself. I feel like I'm treading water in a really big lake when I should be fighting against the current to make it to the shore. I've gotten too comfortable with my life and haven't been pushing myself to try new things. 





And so, I've decided that it's time to resurrect The Valancy Stirling Project, in all its challenging glory. A new list of things to do, a new list of struggles to overcome. I'm still working out exactly what it is I want to include, but I have a few ideas that I'm pretty excited to share. 

But before we begin a new list, I am proud to say that I (without remembering that most of these things were on the list in the first place) completed quite a few of the items on last year's list. Yay me!




3. Get in Better Shape: I joined a wellness group, started running and eating better, and as a result I am excited to report that I have lost 22 pounds and 26 3/4 inches since February.

4. Be a Kick-Ass Maid of Honour: It was the most beautiful, relaxed, joyous wedding that I have ever been to, and my speech and slide show went over very well. I'd say I succeeded.  

6. Cook Meals at Home as Much as Possible: Prepping on Sundays has become one of my favourite times of the week and I have discovered some amazingly healthy and delicious new recipes in the process.

7. Start an RRSP: I did this! Like a real grown up, I made an appointment at the bank and set it up. If I retired today I could buy myself a whole order of groceries with what I've saved so far! Good thing I have 35-40 years to go...

8. Expand My Product Line and Build Up Stock: Check! I set up a mobile Blue Box Creations system that is always in my trunk. Now I can just restock items periodically.

9. Build Up My Savings: I finished paying off my student loan in August and am now putting that money in the Tax Free Savings account I opened while I was setting up my RRSP. 

11. Stop Being Late All the Time: Oh so much progress!! I'm still occasionally a few minutes late, but it's so much better than it was. 

There were only 11 things on last year's list so it looks like I did pretty well. Now to create this year's list. Once I know what it'll include, you'll know. I've discovered that I'm still changing. And I think I need to get to know who I'm becoming. 

Oh Hey, Year Two. I Forgot About You!

I felt it was time that I updated you all, dear readers on what I DID manage to accomplish in The Valancy Stirling Project Year Two. I had intended to make nice big posts on each item, but obviously that was a big fail. So instead, I will do one big post and give a summary of each completed item. 

Here's a link to the original post about Year Two:  The Valancy Stirling Project Year Two

1. See One of My Bucket List Musical Acts in Concert: I was a child of the 80's, and as such I did a lot of my maturing during the 90's. One of the biggest bands of the 90's was The Goo Goo Dolls. I fell in love with them the minute I heard their song 'Iris'. For those of you who've never heard it (and therefore have probably been living in a cave for the last couple of decades), 'Iris' is an amazing song about love that seems unattainable.

Iris- The Goo Goo Dolls

Now, for those of you who have known me for a while, you will know that there was a period of time when I thought it was my lot in life to be the human embodiment of this song. My teenage years were a successive string of unfulfilled crushes and disappointments. This song was my mantra. I can't tell you the hours I spent listening to this song, usually crying. But over the years, I have gained more confidence in myself and, after a few moderately successful relationships, am now patiently waiting for the love of my life. He'll come around eventually...right???

Anyway, I discovered that I loved many more of their songs, and have always wanted to see them perform live. And then I heard that Matchbox 20 (who I also love) was coming to Moncton WITH THE GOO GOO DOLLS, so I rounded up some friends and we headed off. 

On August 28th, 2013, 15 years after I first discovered this song, I finally heard it performed live. Yes, the guys are a few years older, but they still know how to play, and it was just as amazing as I'd always hoped it would be. I sat there with my eyes closed, remembering that 15 year old girl who loved this song and of course, I cried again. But it was different this time. It wasn't the hopeless cry of someone who felt unlovable, but the thankful cry of someone who had made it to the other side and knew what possibilities lay ahead. Life goal fulfilled.

2. Make My Own Ketchup: This one was pretty cool, and easier than I'd always thought it would be. I even used (mostly) tomatoes that I grew in my own garden. If I did it again (which I probably will), I would use the food mill like the recipe suggested. I didn't have one, so I used a combination of a potato ricer my mom had kicking around and a sieve. Which made a huge mess and was slightly frustrating, but DID manage to eliminate the skins and most of the seeds from the tomatoes. It was kind of a stinky process, but the end result was actually really good! It was thinner than store-bought ketchup, so in the future I'd either let it simmer longer or thicken it a bit. I gave most of it away as gifts, because I realized that I don't actually eat ketchup very often... 

3. Meet one of the 12 Doctors: Although there are now 13. Technically. If you're a fan you'll understand, if not, there's no point trying to explain. ANYWHO, after my earth shattering decision in Year One to watch all episodes of Classic 'Doctor Who', I then completed the set and watched all the new Who. And then I went to Halcon. HALCON!! For those of you not as well versed in all things fandom related (read; geeky) as I, Halcon is a Sci-Fi/Fantasy/General Geekdom convention held every fall in Halifax. I could go on and on (and on and on and on) about Halcon, especially since I have now attended 2 years in a row and THIS year I met Mark Sheppard who has been in nearly every geeky show I love (Doctor Who, Firefly, Supernatural, X-Files and countless more). But I digress. 

Above you will see a picture of me with Peter Davison, Fifth Doctor and genuinely nice human being (also, father-in-law to David Tennant aka Tenth Doctor, and father to Georgia Moffet, aka the Doctor's daughter in the episode "The Doctor's Daughter", aka Mrs. David Tennant. Confused yet? Welcome to the fandom. It's all very wibbly wobbly). Kindly disregard the RIDICULOUS look on my face. I was in shock. I believe I stammered out something along the lines of "I love your work" in between goofy grins, shaking and blushing. Consequently, in the days leading up to meeting Mark Sheppard (who is known to tease and cajole people who come to see him), I had a real, unshakable fear that I was going to get up there and blurt out "I love turtles!!' or pass out. But I didn't. I played it much more coolly and even exchanged a few pleasantries with him. AND he called me 'sweetheart'. Here's photographic proof that I looked less like a tool than last year. My hair is better too. 

4. Sell Some Handmade Items: I definitely succeeded with this one. It started out small with co-workers ordering crocheted hats, and then I went to a couple of craft sales. I've since expanded my product line, gotten some fancy schmancy business cards and created a Facebook page for my items. I earned enough from selling my items last year and this year to do almost all my Christmas shopping. I do get a bit overwhelmed at times, and I have to gain some better time management skills, but all in all it's something I really enjoy doing and what better way to make some extra pocket money?

7. Complete My Reading Challenge for 2013: Well, I failed this one. I even changed my goal to 45, and still failed. In all fairness, I shouldn't say I failed. I read 42 books, which is a lot more than most people read, I suppose. I always plan to read 50 books, but the last few years I've had to alter that a bit. In my defense, at the end of the 2013 challenge I went without power for 6 days, and when it came back on all I wanted to do was soak up all the technology I'd missed in those 6 days. In July of 2014 we had a hurricane knock a tree down onto our house, disconnecting our power for another 9 days. Given that and other things keeping me busy I ended up shortening my list to 15, which I managed to complete. So far this year I'm 5 books behind, but it's early days and I'm confident I can catch up.

9. See a Movie in IMAX: I did this during Halcon 2013. My friends and I went to see "Thor 2". We almost didn't make it, since our GPS took us on some weird tour of the industrial underbelly of Halifax. We could SEE the theatre up on the hill, but couldn't figure out how to get there. I, of course, was driving. And swearing, as is my general habit when things don't go my way while driving. Eventually I just drove toward the theatre, turning when I had to. We were there plenty early, because the Halifax theatre didn't have assigned seating like ours does in Saint John, so we had to wait in line FOREVER to get good seats. Lame. And to think, there was a time when I hated the idea of assigned seating. How young and foolish I once was...

My thoughts on IMAX? Not impressed. Not this IMAX anyway. I was expecting this full, robust experience, with the wrap around screen and high tech glasses. What I got instead was a hard seat, only marginally bigger screen, average 3D effects and the single most uncomfortable pair of glasses I have ever worn in my life INCLUDING the crazy face-covering shades I had to wear after my laser eye surgery. I won't be rushing back.

11. Continue to Nurture My Doctor Who Obsession: Ummm, yeah. I succeeded. The theme song was my ringtone for months. I have figurines all over my living room. I've seen every episode EVER, many of the new ones twice. I saw the 50th Anniversary Special AND the Season 8 premiere in theatre. I engage in lively and well informed debates on what qualifies someone to be a true companion (Captain Jack, River Song and Mickey = NO. You'll never change my mind!!), and get almost giddy when I find someone else who has seen the Classic episodes and can therefore understand what I'm talking about when I say "Ugggg, ADRIC!" or, "I wish they'd bring back The Rani!", or "Jamie was the best companion because he trekked all over time and space in a kilt!!". Yes. I'd say I nurtured it...









15. Cook Meals at Home as Much as Possible: I did really well at this in 2013. 2014 not so much. Especially at the end. Cooking for one is hard, and you can only freeze so many things. I'm now better at judging how much a recipe makes and how much I will legitimately eat. I've also started sharing some with my parents, which saves them some time and money too. I'm getting a lot better at this once again, in my efforts to get in better shape, which is one of the goals for Year Three. I started a fitness challenge about 4 weeks ago and so far I'm down 8 pounds, and several inches (I'm guessing about the inches. We aren't taking those til halfway through). 


And so there we are. All that I DID manage to do in Year Two, and a bit of a glimpse into Year Three. It feels good to be back!

Confessions of a Reformed Speed-Demon

We all have those little habits that we wish we didn't have. I actually have many. Like my cuticle mangling. And my procrastination. And the fact that I'm always late. But perhaps the one that I'm starting to hate the most is my speeding. Because it's costing me a lot of money.

I started driving late in life. I've only had my licence for 4 years. In all honesty, I think the final push for me to get it was to prove to my ex (during the SECOND time we'd broken up) that I could do it, in an effort to get him back. I guess it worked. Please hold your comments, since we all know how that turned out. Anyway, I'd put it off for years (there's that procrastination again), mostly because I couldn't afford driver's ed, or a car, and quite frankly, I was scared shitless to get behind the wheel of a 3 tonne death machine. But I did it none the less and have since discovered that I frigging love to drive. Seriously. I love to drive. But sadly, the bi-product of someone who loves to drive and is perpetually late is a person who drives WAY too fast.

I come by it honestly. My father dives fast, much to the frustration of my mother. He drives fast, unless I want him to. And then he drives like a damn old lady. But that is neither here nor there. My mother doesn't drive, and since I got my licence in my late 20's, my father had to drive me around for a very long time. Ergo, he was my main driving role model. So I drive fast. I should probably have taken it as a sign though, that even my DAD comments on my lead foot. I am proud to say, however, that I pay a lot more attention than he does. He tends to take in the scenery when he drives. I pay closer attention to the road. 

Now, when I'm NOT running late (which, admittedly isn't very often), I usually only go a bit over the speed limit. Unfortunately, that's never when I get caught. And yes, I have gotten caught more than once. Twice, to be precise. Twice in the four years I've had my licence. I've been fortunate enough to have kindly police officers who have given me a lower ticket than I should have gotten, but still, I work hard for my money and hate giving it away as penance for my stupidity. And so it was, after my second speeding ticket, that I decided to stop rushing through life. And my plan is to extend it beyond just my driving.

Little Lisa came into the world 18 days past her due date. And as my mom says, I've been late ever since. So really, it's not my fault. But I am the one who has to deal with the consequences. I hate that I'm always late, and although a little part of me is convinced that there are some mysterious forces in the universe that conspire against me to make me late, I am deciding to make a change in my behaviour. I'm tired of making people wait for me. I'm tired of being the last one to arrive. And I'm tired of being the one everyone expects to be late. It makes me feel bad. It makes me feel disrespectful to the people I love the most. It makes me look unprofessional. And it makes me feel like I'm always in a rush. No one wants to rush their life away.

And so, I'm adding a new item to my list. It'll be one of the most difficult things I've ever put on there. I am going to stop being late all the time. I want my punctuality to be the rule, not the exception. And as a result of this, I am hoping I no longer feel the need to speed. If I take more time to get things done, maybe I'll enjoy them, and my life more.

Hello Blog Post, My Old Friend

Oh hey there! I didn't see you come in. Have a seat. How have you been? We haven't seen you in a while.

Because I am just awful at blogging.

Not really. I'm just not able to dedicate my attention to all the things I want to do. Last year when I should have been blogging I was crocheting and crafting my bloody FINGERS off because I started a Facebook page to sell stuff. And I did pretty well. I've bought about 90% of my Christmas presents for the last 2 years  with proceeds from the page. I also majorly failed my reading challenge for 2014, reading only 15 of the 50 books I had HOPED to read, AND I pretty much stopped preparing meals at home, causing me to gain some weight and lose more money than I would have liked. I guess I had a bit of an off year all around. 

There were some successes though. I got a new car. I went on multiple dates. I was promoted at work. My sister got engaged and asked me to be her Maid of Honour. I laughed a lot and strengthened many friendships. And I feel like I became a lot better at not letting disappointment and frustration turn me into a negative person.







Typically I like to start my lists of goals on my birthday, but that's six months away and I feel like it's time to jump start myself now. So I'll make a shorter list that I can complete in the next six months, and then on my 32nd (ugggg) birthday I'll make a new big list. Some of the list items will be new. Some of the list items will be brought back from my abysmal 2nd year list. I shit the bed on that one big time. And I'm going to go back and write posts for the items I WAS able to complete from year 2. Lots of fun posts should come out of that!

And so here is my list for the next six months. Wish me luck!

1. Make at Least 3 More Pieces of Clothing: This was on year two's list. And I still want to do it! There are 2 pieces in particular I am looking forward to making.

2. Make My Own Ice Cream: Because I love ice cream and it sounds fun.

3. Get in Better Shape: Because sometimes the stairs leave me winded. Not. Cool.

4. Be a Kick-Ass Maid of Honour: I guess my sister will be the ultimate judge of this one. 

5. Go Skating: Hopefully I won't break my ass in the process. 

6. Cook Meals at Home as Much as Possible: That's just common sense.

7. Start an RRSP: Because I need to retire some day and don't want to end up living in a tent eating cat food.

8. Expand My Product Line and Build Up Stock: I planned to do this during my off season last year. But...I suck.

9. Build Up My Savings: Even with wedding expenses, I know I can do this!

10. Cook and Eat a Turducken: Because it sounds friggin' bad-ass.

11. Stop Being Late All the Time: Self explanatory.

And so there it is. I've really missed my list and blogging about it. It's not so much that I need the LIST, it's just that I find it so motivating and it helps remind me to always keep growing and challenging myself to do new and different things. I can't wait to see how it goes!